Welcome Home

Entry to our Southampton home

I’m a real daddy now.  My partner and I have a little girl, Julia, who was born in August of 2008.  And I spend a lot of time focusing on home.  I’ve always had a strong domestic streak, even for a gay guy.   But I’ve also had serious day jobs – I’m a corporate lawyer by trade, and, most recently I was the General Counsel of a public company.

Julia on her first birthday

Lately, though, my life has taken a sharp domestic turn.  Shortly before Julia was born, my company was sold, leaving me with time to feather our nests for her arrival and focus on our home life during her first year.  It’s been a big change –often fun, sometimes unfamiliar and uncomfortable, and a lot of work.  We’ve completely rebuilt, furnished and decorated our Hamptons weekend house, moved to and decorated a new apartment in New York City, and made changes to our home in San Francisco to accommodate our little boo.  I’ve also entertained more than I ever have –and I was no slouch before.

Our San Francisco home

During Julia’s first month, I think we had 12 dinner parties, and since then we’ve kept up a pretty good pace for dinners and weekend guests.  Somehow, with a new baby in the house, it feels right to gather people together at home.

I’ve learned a lot too.  Yes, I’ve picked up lots of skills and, I think, some great ideas, but most importantly, I’m learning how to better incorporate my ambitions for domestic fabulousness into everyday life.  It isn’t just a weekend performance anymore, it’s a daily reality, and that’s changed the way I do things.  Now, added to the demands of work, a relationship, health, friends, family, hobbies and intellectual pursuits are the joys and demands of a toddler, and, for me, that really snapped things into focus. I’ve had to get really organized and let go of my perfectionism and taste for the elaborate and make a serious attempt at balance.

Our Manhattan apartment building next to the new Highline park

I’ve learned to keep my projects simpler, faster, easier, more fun.  And I’ve learned to enjoy the process of making things almost as much as the finished product itself.  Whether you’re a daddy or not, I hope I can help you do the same.